How to Persuade Others to Your Side?
To be a successful negotiator, one must know how to persuade others to one’s side. In this chapter, the many ways and techniques in which the leader or the manager can apply to influence his or her people are illustrated and discussed. It is intended that
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Let us move from the era of confrontation to the era of negotiation. Richard M. Nixon My idea of good company… is the company of clever, well- informed people, who have a great deal of conversation; that is what I call good company.’ ‘You are mistaken,’ said he gently, ‘that is not good company; that is the best.’ Jane Austen, Persuasion Persuasion is achieved by the speaker’s personal character when the speech is so spoken as to make us think him credible. We believe good men more fully and more readily than others: this is true generally whatever the question is, and absolutely true where exact certainty is impossible and opinions are divided. Aristotle
12.1 Introduction I think the power of persuasion would be the greatest superpower of all time.—Jenny Mollen
“Leadership is influence.” indicated John Maxwell. A leader or a manager must influence his or her people; (s)he has to be persuasive to get things done. And to influence is to persuade or convince others to one’s side of the story and one’s messages. Things are done without force or compulsion. Is persuasion better than force? Then again, is power “more powerful” than persuasion? Can position(s) get things done? Can power move people better? © Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2020 K. C. P. Low, Successfully Negotiating in Asia, Management for Professionals, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-48655-6_12
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12 How to Persuade Others to Your Side?
Whatever it is, successful negotiations are also winning over people through persuasions, and not just applying power, authority or force. Often to be persuasive and influential, a person needs to apply a mix, a potpourri and a range of techniques and ways. Several ways to influence the other party to exist, and these (not in order of priority) include the following.
12.1.1 Listening When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.—Ernest Hemingway One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.— Bryant H. McGill Listen well to our people. Let them talk. Listen, listen deeply (Low 2013, p. 64, 2018).
Certainly, there is a strong need to listen to or hear out others. On several occasions, I encountered people who simply shouted, screamed or even just talked without even hearing or listening to what the other persons were talking about. If they have had listened to, the Other Party (OP) would not have been so reactive to their screaming and shouting and that, the lack of listening, worsen the whole situation; it muddied the waters. When the OP asks the person and if without even giving the façade of hearing out the OP, the person simply answers “No”. That “No” has not been considered; it gives the impression of a flat “NO” or rejection. Hear out the OP, his or her views and opinions and do, in fact, show that you have considered his or her request by pausing or showing some thinking that’s going on in your head before giving an outright “No”. “We all want to be valued” (Donadio 2012: 13) and certainly NOT “treated as unimportant” (Manning and Cu
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